"I Think There's Been a Mistake..." "Did You Say STEAK?!?" "No, MIStake!"

You know what I could go for right this second? A burger. Like one of those big juicy ones, totally still mooing on the inside, grill charred on the outside. On top, Id like mushrooms and onions, but not raw onions, because I'll burp those up until July 4th. I'd also like some cheese. Cheddar. Lots of serious ketchup. And mustard. No bun, and a pickle.

FOODPORN!!!

Ok ok, I'm totally dreaming of what I will have after I walk the stage this weekend to compete in my first NPC Bikini show this season. If you know me (or if ya don't) you know I have been preparing for this thing for basically a year, when I did terrible in my last show, for many reasons. I could have chosen to run and hide and never give it another shot, but dammit I just love to lift weights too much and if so many other people could get into stage shape, why not me? I decided this time, I would do it my way, or no way. I'm not one for following direction. Never was. For me, its never enough to have just listened to someone and done something, I need to know the WHY and the HOW. If someone tells me what to do with no reasoning behind it, I struggle to even bother to DO it!! Plus, I've learned I need to say I did something MYSELF, or it's a nearly worthless accomplishment in my mind. That's my independent streak talking I suppose. Anyhow,  I decided I would learn this getting shredded things for myself, and if I looked decent come show season, I'd give it a go.

I ended up turning out an OK product over the past year, so this weekend that's just what I'm going to do. I've had some great help and support along the way, those people know who they are. But ultimately, this is me and me alone. My project, my product, my work.

Now, I don't believe in turning away good advice and help, and hearing it and processing it alone can teach you so very much. Listen to what people who have been in your shoes before you say, and then do what you will with it, but always LISTEN!!! It's all part of your path, and even bad or wrong advice, can show you what is RIGHT when you may not have seen it before.

Fitness, is so much like business. I may elaborate on that in another post some time. But, even Sir Richard Branson, who started over 400 companies under Virgin Group, said the secret to success? "Work out."

Why? I think, because it requires a certain mentality. The external after all, is a manifestation of the internal. Yeah, your grey matter. Your brain. Its more powerful than your physical being. So if you can grasp the mentality it takes to create an elite physique (or even a better than average one, which isn't a crazy aspiration in America) what the $*#& else can you do?!?!

I'm not here now to tell you entirely how to get into that mindset. Some of it is probably personality type. I'm a little OCD about details, but I am THE LEAST organized person ever. Do you want to see my kitchen right now? No, no you don't. (Sorry mom and dad!!) But, when I design, I measure to the millimeter to center things. I count my diet like one extra mushroom will result in needing to ride one of those scooters around the Wal-Mart. I pay disgustingly close attention to artistic detail. But I can't see how dirty the shower is. Probably a little bit sick in the head. :P

At any rate, the point here today is, no matter what goal you are pursuing, you're chicken shit scared and you probably aren't going for it as much as you could be. What are you scared of most? Mistakes. Messing up. More importantly, public mistakes. Because you care what people think. Look back at old posts where I already told you that.

Last year on that stage, I kinda looked terrible. I did two shows last year, but I only really ever talk about one. Because the second one, I was dead last. I was unprepared. My diet was a mess and I was hardly following one anymore. My hair was barely done. I looked unkempt and brought a half assed package to that stage. I messed up. It was public. Everyone saw. It was my fault for not taking control of my situation and being responsible for myself that day.

I see the same in business. Recently, I made a mistake there too. I messed up. I missed an error. I had 1000 of something printed up and they were all incorrect. It happened. It's going to happen. Because despite my detail orientation, I am human. I make mistakes. I miss things. And when it happens, it will be public. People will see. People will hear. Sometimes, in other unfortunate cases recently, things blow up and mistakes even make the news.

At first, I was disturbed. I didn't want a bad reputation, I was honestly questioning my own abilities, and wondering if I even DESERVED to work with anyone else if I was just going to disappoint them or make more mistakes. You can always be more careful. But you have to realize there's ALWAYS a risk of mistakes. ALWAYS ALWAYS. Why the hell would I let that risk set me back, TAKE RISKS or you simply cannot progress.

Then I thought about that physique show. Yeah I publicly messed up. But NO ONE REMEMBERS. I pulled myself up by my bootstraps after that blunder and I didn't quit. I found another way. I kept doing it because I love it. And I ignored the failure of last time. I blocked it out. I moved on. This weekend a lot of people, probably you if you are reading this and you know me, are going to be watching me to see how I do in this show. You've maybe been watching me work on my self project for a while now. And I may totally lose and bomb out again. Might make a mistake. Might fail. And hundreds of people will see. But I'm not scared of that because no matter the outcome, I know that journey was worth it, not for the end result but for the other 364 days I worked to get there. And there will be 364 more to follow, because I love to train and I'm not doing this to prove anything to anyone.

People ask how I get up there and I'm not nervous. Because why should I be? It's nothing in the end. Its 30 seconds. It's 30 seconds out of millions of seconds of my life, for a purely physical sport. There will be years of shows ahead of me if I so choose to participate in them.

And in my business, there will be years ahead to progress in that, as well. I will certainly make more mistakes. 100% freakin guaranteed. But I can't let that fear hold me back from showing you and everyone else exactly what I'm capable of and how I can help you. Handle mistakes with honor. Don't ignore them or run from them, but instead apologize, face them, fix them, work around them, and most importantly, learn from them! They, like all those people who offer advice, are the best teachers on your path. Everything and everyone you encounter brings you where you need to go. Let it. Risk it. Don't fear opinions. Fail and fail publicly. Let everyone see you do it. Hell, give them binoculars. What of it? You'll still wake up tomorrow and you'll still find happiness in the things you love. Let that fear of MISTAKES go and instead, strive to make as many damn mistakes as it takes to learn enough to be very successful. The only mistake you should stop making, is inaction. That one is the ultimate blunder that simply cannot be overcome. So get off your asses now and go screw something up with enthusiasm!

On the upside, this writing took just long enough, that its almost dinner time! No burger or steak yet, (or chocolate, I realllllly want some fudge covered peanut butter, or peanut butter covered fudge) but
I do get some pretty tasty eats. Somewhere, someone gets none tonight. Somewhere, some cow is settling in for his last evening before becoming my post show refeed. Ok, that was a little depressing. Sorry! Keep the vibes positive people! Until next time!

If you want to risk an awesome encounter for you next design or tshirt project, check me out at www.tamaramorrisongraphics.com . Mistakes not guaranteed ;)

I Love Peanut Butter, and I'm a Little Selfish. You Should Be Too.

Are you ever sitting there, doing something totally nonchalant like clipping your toenails, or maybe something magnificent, like watching the sunset in Maui, and you realize, suddenly, that you will NEVER know what it would be like to experience this life as anyone else? Never. I mean this point of view you have, right here, right now, reading this, is something no one else will ever know.

It's scary really if you sit there and ponder it. There are billions of us, yet no two experiences on this planet are ever the same and YOU ONLY GET ONE.

I have a scar on my right knee from when I was trying to "surf" by standing on a pool tube NEXT to the pool. Of course, I fell off and diced my knee open. My grandpa was supposed to be watching me, but he had fallen asleep. (A normal occurrence for him!) Every time I look at that scar I remember him. I have calluses from weightlifting that remind me how much I love it every time I look at my hands. I love reggae music and peanut butter and chicken with cinnamon and mustard on it. My daddy is still my biggest supporter. Some people have never met their fathers. And I will never have to know what that's like.

Is this how they make Peanut Butter?!

I will also never know what it's like to be a child that was abused, or to come from a huge family. And you won't know what it's like to still get bothered by the smell of burning brakes and metal on the highway. Or maybe, you will, but not because you were going 70mph on January 10, 2010 when you got struck from behind and spun around three times into a bridge, walking away from your destroyed car with only a broken nail. Maybe you'll have a similar story. But it won't be exactly the same. The story of your life can never, from start to finish, be the same as my story.

Only one person is there with you, from the moment you're born till the moment you die. Only one person knows what scares you, what you love, what hurts, what you really think, all your scars, what it looks like when you ate some bad pigs-in-a-blanket, and you have your body rebelling from both ends...at once. Not pretty. Not pretty. That person is you. You live and die with you, my friend. You know what else lives and dies with you? Everything you do in your little slice of time and space here. There seems to be a few reasons I see, that people think they shouldn't fully ulilize that finite slice. But it's time to knock those to the curb and write some plot twists into your story. Here's why you might be reluctant...

1) You think people are going to remember  - People love you. They do, I promise. SOMEONE (several someones!) is deeply effected by your presence. But we all think people care far more about us and our stories than they do. And it holds us back. You don't want to be seen in high school wearing hand me downs because the other kids will laugh. You don't want to go to the gym because people are going to recoil in disgust at your back fat. You don't want to start a business because you might fail and people might see. People might say you suck. People might see you fall on your ass if you get up on stage and try to walk in heels and a bikini, like I'm about to in a week. Yup, should that happen, they'll see. They'll laugh. It will suck. And in ten years, no one will remember including me. But YOU WILL always remember that thing you wanted to do but never did because of the things you thought people might say and think. People are going to think and say things about you anyways. If you do nothing, they'll say your a lazy recluse.  Remember, you live and die with you and you alone. When you're 80, sitting on some nursing home porch with drool down to your armpits, most of them won't be there. You will though.

2) You're afraid of being selfish - "Selfish" is painted as this horrible concept in our society. Its widely agreed that its bad to be seen as selfish. To care about ones self. But if you don't even care about yourself, who the heck else is going to? I think, acting selfish, and BEING selfish are two different things. Acting selfish, would be that trait we all don't like. Being mean and arrogant, unwilling to help people who need you, putting everyone else last, having no consideration for other people's feelings or situations. But BEING selfish, could simply be taking care of YOU and taking the time to work on the one person you have complete control of. Invest in you. You have nothing to give to anyone else if you're so busy ignoring your own thoughts and aspirations because you feel guilty chasing your purpose for being here. By doing your thing, you inspire other people. Be it your children, your friends, and strangers you've never even met. And that is the very definition of UNselfish.Giving isn't always giving time, or money, or THINGS to a charity on a poster. It could be giving positive vibes.

3) You get too attached to important people in your life - We all have that friend. The one who you think would probably jump headfirst off a bridge if their significant other ever left them. They claim to be "so in love". They don't do things if the other person doesn't like them. They do things BECAUSE the other person tells them to. They don't really do much without the other person. But who are THEY? What do THEY give to this thing called existence?  I have been with the same person for 8 years. We like some of the same things of course. But we like a lot of different things. I'm a fitness competitor. He works out, but he has no desire to go as hard as me for that goal. I use that same mentality to run my business. He prefers being part of a team/company. He plays softball and loves it. I don't even know which way to run. (I'm NOT exaggerating) I can't swim in the ocean. Hate it. He's a fish out there. He races cars. Cars are shiny and pretty to me, but I have the same interest in racing as he does in counting grams of carbs. Yet we mesh nicely. He doesn't tell me I can't go to the gym. I don't tell him to stop racing. At the same token, he tells me if I'm being a crazy bitch. I tell him if he's being a dumb ass. If we ever split, I will be lost. I love him. But I will still be Tamara Lynn Morrison, artist and designer. I will still have that. I've had that since I was born. I will still love fitness. I will get up at 7AM everyday and do those things. I will live for them as I do now. We choose other people to walk our paths with us. But we should never choose to cling to them and let them drag us by the neck. Never make anyone else your everything. Because when/if they leave, you will have nothing. You will be nothing. At the end no one can die for you. You will breathe your last breath with your own two lungs. Why live for your life for someone else??

Find your own passions. Be a little yes, SELFISH and put those dreams first. Then give the happiness those passions give you to other people who deserve to be in your life. UNselfish, see? This life is yours and yours alone. You only get one story, write the book so that when it closes and gets filed away on the shelf of humanity, it deserves a big freaking spot. And please, at any party where they are serving pigs-in-a-blanket, steer clear. Not.....pretty.

Motivated to start living out some dreams that require a designer? ;) You know where to find me www.tamaramorrisongraphics.com

New Year, Same You....Unless You Change Your Outlook!

Its January once again. That time of year where everyone vows that this is going to be their best year yet, THIS year, they'll get in shape, THIS year, they'll score that dream job, fix up the house, take that trip, start saving more. They'll cut out gluten, stop smoking, go on the gym for at least two and a quarter hours per day.

Then you know the pattern. Two weeks later, the resolution makers are loafing on the couch with a cigarette watching reruns with a big bowl of pasta on that new expensive flat screen TV, house a mess, dreading going to work the next day. Maybe in 2014........that's not TOO far off right?

Truth is, you could be dead tomorrow. Life's not guaranteed. You could go down in a fiery wreck on your way to work. Or, you could slip on the ice and suffer internal bleeding in the brain. You could contract a terminal illness, or be shot in your place of work by a maniac. Are these things likely? No, and we rest very comfortably assured that the odds are against these tragedies happening.
I was listening to a colleague talking the other day, about how much he wishes his life would've taken another path. IF ONLY he'd done better in high school, had different parents, made more money, figured out earlier what he wanted to do, had more time, he wouldn't be stuck in this darn job, he'd be happy, all would be right with the world!

So why, why do people like my coworker fail time and time again to do these things they claim they so desperately want to achieve? Why talk on and on about positive actions that will never be taken? Many people simply believe these things are not for them. Dreams are for someone else. Why them? They aren't anything special, they barely passed school, they had a bad relationship or two, their parents weren't that fond of them. Kids made fun of them on the playground.They never won the lottery, they got turned down for a few jobs. They focus soley on these little events, each one like another small rock being tied to their leg until they can no longer move. So they convince themselves that where they are is OK, it could be worse, they could be THAT GUY with twice as many rocks tied to him.

They choose to ignore the bigger picture.That everyone who ever succeeded had setbacks, rocks tied to their legs. But those people, those people cut those rocks off, even if they had to do it with their own teeth because they couldn't find a knife. Whatever it was they saw in their future was brighter than all those little negatives. Most people get stuck in those.

Most people focus on the short term, that's human nature. If today is negative, so is well....forever. But you can train yourself to look further down the road, track your life as a flowing river rather than jagged hard set steps, where if you trip over one, you can't see anything but the ground in front of you, and you don't ever have to get up. Yes, that rivers going to have scary rapids at some points, but you can't possibly stop moving forward once you set sail.

This year don't make any silly resolutions you wont keep. Decide to set sail towards that dream. It doesn't have to be a huge goal (although it can be!), to be the next American Idol or make as much as Taylor Swift by 2039. It can be as simple as starting a business doing what you love, perfecting your golf swing, training your dog to compete in agility, going to school to become a nurse. Whatever that THING is that you want more than anything but that seems about as possible as spotting a giraffe in Antarctica. You know that thing. You think about it every single day at least once. But everyone tells you you already have it so good, or that its silly, or you don't have the money, or the kids demand too much attention and you're selfish. Or they tell you you'll never be able to do that. They push you down on those stairs. And you can't see past the ground. So you stay there.

Everyone who ever succeeded had all those obstacles, some had MORE. Realize this first. No ones better than you. You are better than no one. But you can choose to be wiser. WAKE UP. Cut those rocks off your feet and move from that place of unrest and that cloud of other peoples opinions. Have faith in your goals and yourself even when no one else does. Let yourself feel angry, hurt or upset when they attempt to bring you down. Then get over it, and continue on down the river. Never stop moving forward. Happy 2013.

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Meet the Tees - BEAST MODE ENGAGED!

"Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly. — Stephen R. Covey"

If anything has changed my life in recent years, I would have to say it was my time spent in the gym. For many people, the gym seems to be a sort of torture chamber, a punishment for eating too much cake the day before, or watching too much TV. They go in, do their time, and get out, thankful that its over. For me, that was never the case. I am not sure why exactly, but I became addicted shortly after my first visit. I always liked the idea of being strong, not being a wimp, showing up the boys, and getting a reaction out of people. And because I'm not like most girls in the gym, I do get some interesting reactions. I suppose that desire to impress myself and others is what keeps me so motivated. There's no end to what you can do, how your actions can help shape your body, which in turn shapes your mind. If you put tons of drive, discipline, effort, and research into making a physical change in your body, and you watch it happen from the inside out, and you tweak it and you build it how you want, its just a very inspiring thing. If you could do that, if you could devote yourself to something with so much passion that you could make a change that you can see and feel, what ELSE can you do? With just as much passion, you could do literally ANYTHING. Start a business, build a car from the ground up, travel the world, whatever it is that you consider just a dream today. For a lot of people, its just too hard. People like easy. People like fast. It's taken me three years to get where I am in my gym training and my running. I was a wimp the day I started. I had no idea what I was doing, I couldn't even run a mile. Success took hundreds of hours, tons of research, and just a small step was climbed each day. That experience however, has taught me so much. Its taught me that all things worthwhile take time. They also take research. Lots of research. Perhaps most importantly, they take confidence. Confidence grows every time you hit even a small goal. It inspires you to keep going, and go even harder the next time around. No one else is doing what you are? Who cares, be the one person who dares to try whats not normal. Go harder because you can. Who the hell said you can't? Just that little voice in your head, because if any other person is telling you you can't it doesn't matter. Don't accept anything less then 100%,  in anything you do. Don't feel like it today? Too bad. Lots of people don't feel like doing what it takes to be successful today. Those who get somewhere, will do it anyways. Those who get nowhere, will think up an excuse and do the minimum, again. It is this realization and mentality, that has even lead me to start my own design business. I wouldn't have the confidence or faith to do this, if I didn't have proof that if you work harder, than anyone else, than your average person, you can really reach your goals. It's much the same as the gym mentality. Don't get discouraged by minor setback. Accept it and move on. Accepting that each day will not be perfect is part of being sucessful in the end, because if you don't those hangups will strangle you. Try harder than anyone else. Research, and do lots of it. And don't quit. Never, ever stop trying to find that magic formula for success, even when you don't feel like it.

In honor of my love for fitness, I have created a couple of gym centered designs. The one featured here, "Beast Mode Engaged", is just meant to represent the excitement and drive that often comes with a great workout, the drive to kick your own ass, and excel beyond what you have achieved before. In other words, to become a "beast" and take no excuses, no mercy, no whining, and to go all out because you can and you have nothing to lose.

The gym may not be your thing. But whatever you do, have SOME thing, where you can engage your inner "beast". I don't care if its building model airplanes, acting out World War II battles, raising children, or selling stamps. Pick something you are passionate about, and give it 110% until you excel. Because passionless people are in no short supply. And as Dave Matthews says in his song "Lie in Our Graves", "I can't believe that we would lie in our graves wondering if we had spent our living days well." Don't wonder, be positive. Unlike the "Beast Mode Engaged button, life has no repeat button.

Grab this shirt for only $21.95 TODAY @ www.youreaditcustomshirts.com/Store.html, or suggest another gym themed shirt you'd like to see using the Suggestion Box!